Santa was getting ready for his annual trip...but there were problems everywhere.
Four of his elves were sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.
Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More Stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he went to the cupboard, he found the elves had hidden the liquor and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the he kitchen floor.
He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from.
Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door. He opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said: "Where would you like to put this tree Santa?"
And that is how the little angel came to be on top of the Christmas tree.
Replies (11)
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Joke
Santa, an honest politician and a loveable banker were all in a lift in a hotel. They were travelling from top floor to ground floor. About halfway down to the lobby, they spot £50 on the floor of the lift. They look at each other trying to decide what to do. Which of them hands the dosh in at reception?
Santa of course! The other two don't exist!
Happy Chistmas everyone!
Comedy Christmas song
I laughed out loud at this song from comedy 'duo' Dan & Dan (in fact one person videoed twice).
I hope you enjoy it too.
(I did post this in the Money Laundering & Crime discussion group but I think it could stand repeating here.)
David
Elf yourself!
Ever wondered what Rebecca Benneyworth, John Stokdyk and the rest of the AWEB team would look like if they were elves? Well, now you don't have to! Check out our elf dance!
http://elfyourself.jibjab.com/view/03XqzIz4V21ST3G9
I love Elf yourself
We did it with the kids and sent to the grandparents - most amusing and I love the choice of dances you get when you make it. Classic.
Seasons Greetings...I think!
From me ("the wishor") to you ("hereinafter called the wishees") please accept without obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, politically correct, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all .... and a financially successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2011, but with due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures or sects whose contributions to society have helped make Britain great, (not to imply that Britain is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "Britain" in the western hemisphere), and having regard to the species, race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform or dietary preference of the wishees. By accepting this greeting you are bound by these terms that - This greeting is subject to further clarification or withdrawal. This greeting is freely transferable provided that no alteration shall be made to the original greeting and that the proprietary rights of the wishor are acknowledged. This greeting implies no promise by the wishor to actually implement any of the wishes. This greeting may not be enforceable in certain jurisdictions and/or the restrictions herein may not be binding upon certain wishees in certain jurisdictions and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wishor. This greeting is warranted to perform as reasonably may be expected within the usual application of good tidings, for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first. The wishor warrants this greeting only for the limited replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wishor. Any references in this greeting to "the Lord", "Father Christmas", "Our Saviour", or any other festive figures, whether actual or fictitious, dead or alive, shall not imply any endorsement by or from them in respect of this greeting, and all proprietary rights in any referenced third party names and images are hereby acknowledged.