GSOH Essential

If you married and settled count yourself lucky. The process of going through internet dating/matrimonial sites is time consuming with lots of disappointments and frustrations. Older you are the fewer choices you have.

One requirement of my opposite sex that really gets to me time and time again that I read in the profiles is - GSOH essential. What a big lie.

I think to myself a woman goes into a bar sees George Clooney and some fat guy like me with a fantastic sense of humour, who will she pick? Me since I have GSOH. Lets be realistic here! Rich and good looking v fat with GSOH. Who wins?

Plus GSOH is so subjective, my GSOH may not be your GSOH.

I understand where the profile says looking for a tall man. Here it is a clear cut issue but GSOH!

EDIT

Please note I am not looking for meeting people and dating advice. This is just meant to be a tongue in cheek blog post, to ease the last few days of Jan stress

Comments
petersaxton's picture

Being of a certain age ....    1 thanks

petersaxton | | Permalink

I've used an internet dating site.

I still don't see the point of them. When I was younger I was never looking for a girlfriend I just wanted to go out and have fun and when I met somebody I liked I'd go out with them again and have fun again.

I don't think George Clooney uses an internet dating site so your competitive position is a lot better than you think. You never know maybe George Clooney lays awake at night worrying about fat accountants getting all the best girls!

My crazy step daughter is a very attractive young girl but she thought that she's not the type to go wild and meet people so she used Match.com. At one stage had met two guys and one was attractive and fun and the other was boring and fat. She chose the boring and fat one! He's very nice to her though.

If you stop trying to meet women who will impress your friends and family and instead concentrate on getting to know a woman's personality you will have a better chance of success. You will have an even better chance of success if you aim to do all you can to please women. Too many women seem to like an exciting bad boy but if they can't keep them a pleaser wins from the rest. Women like to be pleased!

Recently I seem to have been getting quite a few new clients who are models and TV presenters. They are very nice people as well as being attractive. I do my usual chat about how they can save money by entering receipts on a spreadsheet or at least have different envelopes for each type of expenditure. Maybe if I was single I might have offered to travel to them and do the work myself for free. I could always offer to do the housework while I was there. Eventually they may start to appreciate me and see me as something more than a fat boring accountant. Most likely they wont but at least I've been useful.

An alternative approach might be to do things you like and take the opportunity to meet women and see if you get along. Just hope that George Clooney doesn't appear and turn their heads!

 

ShirleyM's picture

I don't think it is a lie    1 thanks

ShirleyM | | Permalink

I, and many other women I know, appreciate the personality of a man more than his looks. We aren't that bothered if they are fat or thin, hairy or bald, rich or poor. We want someone with a nice personality, and who thinks we are special too.

GSOH to me is important. Humour makes me happy, serious moaning makes me unhappy. I prefer someone who can brush off those little annoyances with a laugh, and more importantly, laugh at themselves and not spoil an evening because someone got to a parking space before they did.

I would choose someone like Joe Pasquale in preference to a serious and dour, but handsome, man. Joe isn't the most handsome of men, he is getting a little heavy around the middle, but he appears to be a genuinely nice guy and he has a GSOH, and he is someone that you could enjoy spending a lot of time with  :)

 

Old Greying Accountant's picture

There seem to be two sorts of women ...    1 thanks

Old Greying Acc... | | Permalink

... on such sites. (in general terms)

There are those genuine ones who just say a bit about what they like doing, and as Shirley says want to meet someone genuine, sensitive and who can string more than a couple of words together - go for these.

The other seem to be career type women who have an unticked box on their checklist, and list a detailed and particular set of attributes, stating what they do and don't want in a partner - it reads more like a job spec than a lonely heart ad and I would be surprised if they met more than players, I mean - if you start nagging before you've even met the guy!

The problem is, people tending to be introverted find it very hard to strike up conversations, it takes exhausting amounts of effort so you tend to find one person you take a shine to at a gathering, spend and hour or three (a) summoning up courage and (b) waiting for the right moment to start a conversation. Afterwards, especially if it becomes apparent you are not suited you are so drained you cannot repeat for at least a fortnight! I also think that being more sensitive there is something not right about flitting round the room from woman to woman like a demented butterfly, and it seems demeaning to me, to say number 12 on the "list" - as it were, and almost insulting  - but that is the introverts skill in over analysing - and it is not something you can easily overcome. When your favourite and most comfortable place to be is at home surrounded by your familar things it is very hard to meet a like-minded soul! Bear in mind if social gatherings leave you one small step away from blind panic and you always keep a clear path to the door in view the chances of meeting a kindred spirit are slim. 

I think the key words Peter said are "he just wanted to go out and have fun" - to introverted people going out does not equal fun, that is the problem, generally they are deep thinking and want to spend their time fruitfully and not speculatively. Going to pubs, getting drunk and chatting with people is not fun to many.

But, I do agree with FirstTab, humour is incredibly subjective, my post on the SAGE forum proves that, and someone got deeply offended and had a hissy fit at something intended as tongue in cheek humour - but hey ho!

tellingd's picture

OGA, someone took offense at    1 thanks

tellingd | | Permalink

OGA, someone took offense at something you said? Who would have thunk it? :-p

Old Greying Accountant's picture

I know ...

Old Greying Acc... | | Permalink

... moi! :oD

Flash Gordon's picture

Introverts striking up conversation..    3 thanks

Flash Gordon | | Permalink

And then there are those of us who don't even manage to get to the social gatherings in the first place!! I can't imagine anything worse than speed dating, at least with dating websites you don't have to talk to people straight away. I've always worked on the basis that if someone says in an advert that they're attractive or good-looking then they're probably not my type. If however they say they've got a dog or cat or they list the last three books they've read..... Personality is way more important.

Now if I could find someone funny, with a few brain cells, who loved reading and animals and only wanted to see me two or three times a year (with emails in between) I'd probably get hitched :)

Old Greying Accountant's picture

Now you're talking Flash ...    1 thanks

Old Greying Acc... | | Permalink

... that would be an ideal lady!

More than GSOH, "good looking" is totally subjective.

Think of it like this, if John Prescott can get married then anyone can!

I mean, he has the look of a bulldog chewing a wasp and the personality to match!

ShirleyM's picture

John Prescott has a very good marriage    1 thanks

ShirleyM | | Permalink

I get the impression that his wife has a very GSOH. She would have to, wouldn't she, but it also appears that he adores her, and she adores him.

I did watch them on 'Mr & Mrs' so I am an expert now :)

Actually, I quite like John Prescott. Not for his political views, but for his honesty. He is forthright, admits his mistakes and doesn't make excuses. Then again, those qualities mean he is totally wrong for any sort of politics.

FirstTab's picture

John Prescott

FirstTab | | Permalink

Power is the great aphrodisiac!

ShirleyM's picture

Eh?    1 thanks

ShirleyM | | Permalink

The women who marry the title/job rather than the man, are shallow, and lacking in self esteem (possibly due to past companions always belittling them and eventually they start to believe them????).

I feel sorry for them, rather than admire them. I struggle to understand how some men (David Gest for one), manage to find a woman who wants to spend any time in their company. They must have hidden talents, because there isn't enough money in the world to compensate for being married to someone so awful.

Old Greying Accountant's picture

Hmmm ...    1 thanks

Old Greying Acc... | | Permalink

ShirleyM wrote:

I get the impression that his wife has a very GSOH. She would have to, wouldn't she, but it also appears that he adores her, and she adores him.

I did watch them on 'Mr & Mrs' so I am an expert now :)

Actually, I quite like John Prescott. Not for his political views, but for his honesty. He is forthright, admits his mistakes and doesn't make excuses. Then again, those qualities mean he is totally wrong for any sort of politics.

... apart from the affair of course!

ShirleyM's picture

so ...    1 thanks

ShirleyM | | Permalink

He admitted his mistake, they worked through it and are still together.

MissAccounting's picture

I would be lying if I said    2 thanks

MissAccounting | | Permalink

I would be lying if I said there doesnt have to be a physical attraction but without doubt the biggest thing I look for in a man is someone who makes me laugh and smile.

You seem to have the weight of the world on your shoulders FT when you really dont need to take the weight.  Just enjoy life, it is far too short!

Old Greying Accountant's picture

@ Flash    1 thanks

Old Greying Acc... | | Permalink

Old Greying Accountant wrote:

... that would be an ideal lady!

More than GSOH, "good looking" is totally subjective.

Think of it like this, if John Prescott can get married then anyone can!

I mean, he has the look of a bulldog chewing a wasp and the personality to match!

I think the wife thinks that is our marriage anyway, especially in January!

Shirley, - but he lied and cheated and you admire his honesty? Admire his courage for admitting mistakes by all means, but not his honesty!

ShirleyM's picture

OGA - you are picking fault in my every word this week!

ShirleyM | | Permalink

(which is a slight exaggeration for dramatic effect :)

... but I forgive you a little bit .... just send a bottle of plonk for full forgiveness ;)

I was really thinking about his politics, rather than his private life. No doubt you will be able to find something wrong there, too, if you look hard enough.

The fact that he is brash, and says what he thinks, to me is far preferable than some smarmy politician who spouts a lot of spin!

 

Flash Gordon's picture

New chat-up line for FT...    1 thanks

Flash Gordon | | Permalink

and anyone else in need - 'I'm better looking than John Prescott'!

Added to which it would also demonstrate a GSOH - two for the price of one :)

Old Greying Accountant's picture

I'm not even going there ...

Old Greying Acc... | | Permalink

... until Friday anyway.

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