It's a dog's life - bureaucracy on 4 legs !

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So man's best friend is once again the subject of Whitehall's attention . I wonder how much of the pond life that thinks owning a dog is a status symbol for terrorising the public, will be queuing up to register their 4 legged weapons. Far better would be to take DNA samples of every pooch in the land and if it matches the bite on the posite's legs then it can be destroyed without delay. It is of course far beneficial to society to destroy some of the owners of these troublesome pooches , after all the dog is only doing what it is expected to do when it perceives a threat as our intrepid and selfless post delivery operatives ( or are they still called postpeople?) stroll innocently towards the council owned property wherein their owners reside.

It would be a great job creation scheme, cost a packet totally out of proportion to the benefit and be widely flouted. It's ideal for a government that needs to takes people's minds of their indecision on real problems. And they could appoint a Chief Canine Control Inspector (Pooch Tsar) at around £100k a year for one day a week.

Our august and revered profession would have a field day crunching numbers and auditing the scheme

Licensed cows , then sheep , now dogs , who is next ...goldfish ?


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4 legs

We need a proper warden system - if the dog is wandering around and chipped the owner gets

fined , if not chipped the dog is removed from the streets.

A dog is a possession , whether you like it or not , and I doubt you will be able to cfhange the mindset of the great British public

And I doubt that chipping a cuddly child friendly pit bull will prevent them from gobbling up the offspring of their "carers"


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DNA testing

Even though it would be an unjustifiable waste of tax payer money, I would be perfectly happy to all dogs to be chipped & DNA registered so that their turds can be conclusively traced to the owners who could then be fined, imprisoned or publicly flogged.

As a regular user of the local park, I am beyond infuriated by the irresponsible minority who seem to think the place exists to be one big animal toilet. It must be even worse for those that take kids there.


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Another typically ...

... ill thought plan.

The people with the problem dogs are not going to care what happens to the dog, and proving ownership of an unchipped dog would be unjustifyably costly - so it will probably be pursued with zeal by the enforcers, after all, it is not their money to waste!.

I also see human rights issues, as many have valid health ground for not chipping, so there should be an alternative method of identification available!

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Dog toilet

What about the litter louts who just chuck their rubbish on the ground yards from a litter bin? Every weekend my local park is covered with water bottles and crisp packets etc from the kids (young and older) who play football there, despite there being several bins. Water bottles don't melt away into the ground. They sit there. Yes some dog owners don't pick up after their dogs and it annots me too, but they aren't the only ones destroying the environment!

And if you want to talk about the most dangerous dogs its actually the small yappy ones that nip. Not the stronger larger ones. I've got a staffy who's the friendliest thing on 4 legs - she'd lick you to death for sure but she'd only bite you if you were ill-treating her first. (And at that point she'd be second in the queue because I'd be beating the crap out of you!) And all the rotties I've known have been the softest creatures. Very few dogs attack for no apparent reason. Most attacks are provoked by ill-treatment by owners (put them down) or thoughtless behaviour by victims (no comment). If you started mis-treating me I'd do something about it so why shouldn't a dog??

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Dogs and litter

A dicarded Coke can is not going to ruin your Axminster or cause irreperable damage to a child.


I am not sure if the word "death is appropriate in a piece about big bad dogs but I get your point

It may be "very few" nasty dogs are out there but a disproportionate number making the headlines are of a certain breed and I am not sure how many are unprovoked.  I am sure your staffie is left to play with babies and toddlers .


By the way - are you insured in the highly unlikely and remote event that your dog does actually cause somebody's death or injury , by licking or otherwise ?


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Discarded rubbish does ruin the environment..... And if a child falls and severs an artery on a discarded broken bottle will you be having someone put down for leaving it there?

I wouldn't leave a dog to play unsupervised with children - children don't understand that dogs don't appreciate having their ears and tails pulled, or being poked and prodded and all the things that kids do.

And yes my dog is fully insured, and micro-chipped, and on a lead around children, and vaccinated, and I pick up after her. That's what responsible owners do. 

There have been quite a few cases of children being killed by cars so maybe we should stop driving. After all a car can take out multiple victims in one go.

(And I used the word death on purpose - she won't savage you to death but she might lick you to death because she's very licky and affectionate??)

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There is good and bad in everything

There are lethal dogs (made lethal by their owners), and there are some wonderful dogs.

Dogs give service (Guide dogs, tracker dogs, drug detection, Pat dogs, security dogs, etc), as well as giving many lonely people a reason to get up in the morning.

Don't blame the dogs for having irresponsible owners. They don't get to choose who owns them.

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Bad dogs

J449 wrote:

 There is no such thing as a bad dog,

Wrong. Oh, so wrong.

I agree that in many cases it is indeed the owner that is at fault, but I could cite a number of cases where that just wasn't so. I'm afraid that the 'bad owner' argument is too easily tossed around by dog-lovers.

As for Pit Bull Terriers, if you want to pick nits, fair enough, but there are plenty of reliable sites and bodies that recognise the American Pit Bull Terrier as a breed. OK, so in reality the 'breed' may be a product of cross-breeding, but to say that there is no such thing as a Pit Bull is nothing but obfuscation. People have claimed that there is no such thing as a dragon, but we all know different.


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J449 wrote:

Do you agree then with the Victorian theory that criminals are born that way?

In a few cases, yes

J449 wrote:

A dog that is vicious isn't born that way,

A few of them are


And why do you say I am judging a book by its cover'? I simply remarked that some dogs (of any breed) are just bad, pure and simple - I wasn't referring to any particular breed of dog.

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There are some dogs born bad

There is a genetic fault in some golden Cocker Spaniels that makes them nasty. It is very rare (fortunately) and they are working hard to breed it out. I met one of these many many years ago when I was showing dogs, and the owner was desperate for a solution, but sadly there isn't one :(

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May be we should ...

... use a colour coding system and tattoo large coloured spots on the foreheads of miscreant juveniles, say red for arsonist, blue for thief, green for violent etc...

Scrub that idea, the little darlings would be competing to see who could get a rainbow first! 

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Apology accepted

Yes we will have to agree to disagree.

But I could provide examples of bad behaviour in dogs that have nothing whatsoever to do with their owners. If you choose to shut your mind to that possibility that is up to you - the facts say otherwise.

I don't believe that I suggested that criminality had anything to do with genetics. Again I do not disagree that in the majority of cases - as it is with dogs (and any other creature) - behaviour is determined by surroundings. But it is a fact that sometimes there is just bad wiring, pure and simple. Again, if you want to close your mind to reality, that is up to you.

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Dog days

This is begiining to look like a dogfight ! I do not own a dog but have often taken working sheepdogs for a walk in the countryside. It is indeed relaxing but although it is a trained beast it has a mind of it's own.

The facts about dog behaviour speak for themselves and the combination of owners and breed is often lethal. So the blame lies with both so the owner can be fined and the hound taken of the streets. Justice for all !

By the way I have always wondered , do German shephers actually herd sheep and cattle in Germany. Somehow the image of a German shepherd gently prodding wayward sheep towards their pens does not fit with the image of a guard dog/

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German Shepherds

They were originally bred to guard the flock, not herd them.

Funnily enough though, when I had chickens my GSD (German Shepherd dog) would round them up and try to keep them close together so she could guard them more easily. It was natural behaviour as we never trained her for that.

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Exactly ...

ShirleyM wrote:

They were originally bred to guard the flock, not herd them.

Funnily enough though, when I had chickens my GSD (German Shepherd dog) would round them up and try to keep them close together so she could guard them more easily. It was natural behaviour as we never trained her for that.

... bear in mind wolves would have been prevalent in Europe when the breed was developed, and interestingly have re-appeared in Germany with a number of packs established in the last couple of decades, believed to have migrated from Poland. 

The Kennel club have ruined the breed as they have most others, and it is now difficult to tell at a glance if they are standing or sitting their backs slope down so much!



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I remember 30 years back

I have always preferred the English breed type, which has a straight back. The German breed type had a very sloping croup and was promoted by many as the 'original' breed type.

I have never owned a German breed type and stuck to the English type. I prefer soundness and longevity over style, but I lost my last GSD through an inherited defect 'degenerative myelopathy' at only 8 years of age. It broke my heart.


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I've always like GSD's ...


wonder why?

 but I'm a spaniel man now!



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Ypu can't beat the sight of a GSD police dog sining its fangs into the shins of a scally. We had one last year chasing after one of the scum through my back garden. Great . Ever since watching Strathclyde Police demonstrating to us as kids it has always been in my mind

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Police dogs all well and good ...

... unless you know how to deal with them! Of course it there is more than one coming at you it makes it more tricky.

Personally I abhor the use of dogs in this way. Search and rescue etc is fine, but to my mind it is an abuse of trust. Just tool the rozzers up and let them shoot the scallies. Rather have a dead scally than a dead police dog, at least the scally had a choice.

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Armed police

Now the debate is moving to arming the police . I think every copper should be armed with a taser but I still think there is a need for police dogs - they don't get hurt and presumably they enjoy it . Is it not better to let the animal do what it is genetically programmed to do ? Hunt . Got to be better than pootling up and down the living room and fed from a can of Pal !

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Working trials

I got interested in dog training when my Dad used to take me to the police dog trials, and Working trials, as a youngster.

My first GSD, and a large crossbreed I had, were both trained for Working trials. We never competed, but they enjoyed the training. One of our instructors (ex army) was sometimes called out to help search for missing people. I had dreams of my dogs being good enough to help, but they never reached that level ... probably because their trainer (me) just wasn't good enough.

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Police dogs

One of my local coppers was bemoaning the reduction in police dogs . He siad that the "chief" didn't think they were good value for money . I haven't looked into the economics of it but would imagine that when the chopper is in the sky hovering above a suspect it saves a lot of time to send in Fido than continue shining the infra red and what not from 500 feet . Marrowbone is cheaper than aviation fuel !

I reckon a single cop walking aroudn with a dog sends out a strong deterrent message , a bit like mounted police , talking of which I have not seen too many of either recently . You always know when they have been around.....

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Flying Scotsman wrote:

I reckon a single cop walking aroudn with a dog sends out a strong deterrent message , a bit like mounted police , talking of which I have not seen too many of either recently . You always know when they have been around.....

... have you checked in Tesco?

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I agree ...

... that dogs love to hunt, but their natural prey isn't likely to let them have both barrels of a sawn off 12 bore full in the face!

Working tests are much more fun, this is my dog's friend in action

Field trials are even better but won't post a link for fear of upsetting the bunny huggers!

Although, may be they are going off those cutsie wutsie foxie woxies a bit now!


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4 legs and butchers

Nice clip !

The police horses in Tesco don't leave the same calling card as the local constabulary's .

This meat business actually is symptomatic of the regualtory frameworks that are foisted upon industry and are useless. Rules and more rules but they don't work becuase they are so complex . Now we can  no doubt expect to throttle a lot of small companies with ever more tightening rules.

I am sure the local butchers are laughing all the way to the bank as queues form outside their emporia , but only until the man from the minsitry decides we need to drive them out of business by wrapping all their prime cuts in red tape


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Can we not just clone DVLA

and use it to register all dogs.


Small fee if neutered, very large fee if entire. Siezed if not chipped

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Haha @Chris

Your comment made me think of a chihuahua walking round with large number plates on it's front & rear :)

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The reason why cars and property can be easily taxed is that they both tick the box of "difficult to hide" . I don't think that pooches fit this fundamental criterion. Furthermore, in the same way that certain types of people drive uninsued and untaxed becuase the car is worth flumpence (or not theirs) , you would find such individuals treating their canine charges the same way. The majority of law abiding dog owners would stump up.

Just imagine the exciting footage of reality tv shows of wardens chasing unlicensed dogs.

Oh yes, one small issue - you can crush the unlicensed car.....

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