Yeah, I know the title is such a common cliche but I feel like so many changes are happening at the moment. The girls' summer holidays are almost over and even though I had decided to take the summer holidays off before I started looking for a new job, this reality is getting closer. I thought taking time off would give me the chance to decide what I want to do next and stop rueing over the jobs that I no longer have and wish that I still could do.
I have one very, very ad hoc freelance writing gig which is good to have but is not a steady income. I’ve decided that I’m probably not going to be a very technical writer and I don’t think I have ever imagined being so but I do still like writing about accounts and tax when I can. I will try to do some as and when I can.
I also like my previous job where I was bookkeeping - not in a practice setting but for one company on a part-time basis. The more I think about it, the more I think I am veering towards that. Although, me being the indecisive person that I am, I also have some other options I'm still contemplating. I have considered finding a social media type role focussing on accountants - a bit of writing, a bit of accounting knowledge and maybe some numbers and I still like doing tax compliance work, so maybe I could get a job doing that.
I vaguely considered attempting to work for myself again but apart from the flexibility to do school runs, plays, after school activities etc, my heart really isn’t into it. I’m capable of working by myself but just not interested in working for myself. I’m still trying to work out why and once I figure it out I’ll write about it but at the moment working for someone kind of suits me.
I’ve got just over a week of school holidays left before I start in earnest looking for more work, although I’ve already applied for a few - I couldn’t help myself. I need to reply to one agency who got in touch with me because as soon as he did, I started panicking. The whole process of looking for a job, going to interviews, trying to be professional but authentic got me worried and I guess finishing the last job was quite depressing and is still playing on my mind.
I will do it. I haven’t come this far to give it all up. Staying at home, (unless I'm working) doesn’t appeal to me either. But trying to find a job that will fit around my life rather than the other way round can still be a bit of a struggle. Even though I want part-time work, it doesn’t mean I don’t want to progress, even if it takes longer to get there.
For now, it might not seem like it, but I do feel a little bit clearer than I have been for a while. Just need to narrow down my options a little bit more before I start applying again.
Attempting to be an amazing accountant and an amazing mum, somehow combine the two and meet somewhere in the middle but currently failing at both. Hoping that in a few years I will have found something I enjoy doing or found some sort of work life balance and will be in a less stressed out place but until then, or as I get there, I think I...