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9 scary stories from ac-count-ants and boo-kkeepers

24th Oct 2022
Brought to you by
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Award winning CRM & practice management software

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Double, double, toil and trouble, what makes you boil and bubble? This Hallowe’en, we asked our practice management software users for stories that’d make your skin crawl. 

Sitting comfortably? You won’t be for long. 

 

Accounting horrors

 

Leg of spider, toe of Bob…

“I've had a spider in some records, coffee stains on some or they're totally illegible… it’s like ‘why are you even giving them to me?’ I love my job, but that’s the worst part of it!” – Khiya Kara, Kara Bookkeeping Specialists (KBS)

“Horrible images of hairy, manky feet we have the misfortune of seeing when a client snaps their receipt and uploads it to AutoEntry. There is just no need. Bork!” – Donna Hannaby, Accrual World Accounting Solutions 

 

Ann of Summers, food of dog?

“We have a client in the transport industry – a sole director of an Ltd – who asked us to complete his YE accounts from his bookkeeping on Xero. Upon our review of said bookkeeping; we had VAT claimed on bank charges, loan repayments and wages?! 

Once our reconciliations were complete we discovered Ann Summers, dog food, school uniforms and the weekly shop being put through as expenditure… VAT claimed and the NET used to reduce profits.  

A very hard conversation and many adjustments later, we got him on the right track and then, on one of our monthly packages to maintain compliance going forward.” – Jay Wilson, Jaccountancy

 

It was a dark and stormy January night…

''A prospective client called me at 8pm on 31st January 2021 (more fool me for answering). Then proceeded to ask questions for ages (I should have hung up with hindsight) …as they filled in their tax return! 

Eventually I cut the call and said, ‘if you would like to use our services please book in a meeting’, obviously never heard from them again." – Andrew Coombs, Kings Oak Accountancy

 

The attack of the tiny folded squares

“We do have a client that once dropped off his receipts in a jigsaw box. They were so tightly folded there were hundreds in there!! We also hate when receipts smell funny! For example we do the books for a cow breeder and sometimes we pull straw out!!” – Megan Lawson, The High Street Accountant

“Here at Maccass and Lang, we don't mind sorting through bags of old school paperwork. But can we make a small request? For the sake of my sanity (and my time keeping), can we please make sure receipts are folded flat and not scrunched into balls! We love an origami puzzle as much as the next person, but please no more folded squares, we beg you!” – Amanda Lang, Maccass and Lang Accounting

AM

The long and lonely road (of calculating mileage)

“Last year a client gave us Self-Assessment work to do. After 3 or 4 emails checking that he’d given everything needed, we calculated the tax return only for them to tell us we had not included his mileage. He wanted us to go through all his sales invoices to calculate the mileage he had done!! – Emma Rees, Mercury Accounting & Financial Services Ltd

 

Fortune tellers – the original accountants?

"A (former) client whilst preparing their year end figures rang up to check the VAT threshold a week or so before his sales and paperwork were ready, I'll let you guess what the turnover was!" – Andrew Coombs, Kings Oak Accountancy

 

And the best costume goes to Director’s Loan, dressed as Dividends

“I once had to break the news to one of our clients that the £35k they thought they had taken as a dividend in fact wasn’t – because they didn’t have distributable profits and therefore ended up with a beefy overdrawn directors loan account they were expecting.” – Kate Gloudemans, Sprout Consulting

 

Rewrite your admin horror stories with AccountancyManager

Find out how to defeat your spreadsheet monsters and deadline nightmares for good with some scarily good practice management software.

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