Networking: Scarier than death?

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Andy Lopata, a speaker at this year's Sage World small business conference, explains why accountants are afraid of networking and outlines how to overcome these fears to boost your business.

In a New York Times survey of peoples’ greatest fears, death came third. The top two fears were walking into a room full of strangers and speaking in public – a fact which makes Andy Lopata's job that much harder. Once dubbed 'Mr Network' by The Sun, Lopata's business is helping accountants (as well as other professionals) overcome these fears and drive their businesses through networking.

The most common misconception about networking, explains Lopata, is that it’s just another word for sales.

"Networking isn't selling; there's a strong perception that you go to networking events to sell as hard as you can and find clients. That's not how it works. Occasionally you might meet someone who later becomes a customer, but the majority are there to sell themselves - so I can't think of a worse place to try and sell because no one's there to buy."

Networking is, in fact, about just that: creating a network of like-minded professionals. "It’s about building relationships – finding people with whom you have a rapport and adding them to your network. It's your network that provides you with business in the long term," explains Lopata.

"Think about it this way: would you rather meet someone at a networking event and sell to them once, or meet them and never sell to them, but be referred by them five or 10 times?"

One of the things many accountants find difficult about networking is not being able to measure whether they are getting a good return on investment on their networking time. Unlike other business activities, the key performance indicators (KPIs) of networking are not always clear.

"Many people attend networking events simply because they're invited, but don't think strategically about what they actually want to get out of it. This often leads to them walking away complaining it's been a waste of time, without them ever really knowing what they were there for in the first place.

"There are three main reasons businesses network. It pays to focus on the combination most suitable for you and which networking events will drive that particular return, which will in turn guide you on what to measure."

The three reasons are:

  • To raise your businesses’ profile
  • To become better equipped – either as an individual in terms of up-skilling and learning from people who have already been through the journey you're on, or as a business you might use it for market research and look for ideas/feedback
  • To become better connected and generate referrals

Networking faux pas
One question you should avoid when networking is the most obvious, 'what do you do?', says Lopata. "This is the networking equivalent of 'do you come here often'! People only ask it as an ice breaker and don't care about the answer. It's a common dance that people get involved in and basically involves each party presenting an 'elevator pitch' (i.e. a 30-second presentation on their business), shaking hands, exchanging cards and then walking away, possibly never to speak again.

"Instead of doing this, it's much better to try and engage them in a genuine conversation and find some common ground. One good way of doing this is finding out what brought them to the event and whether they know anyone else in the room."

One of the other reasons people say they hate networking is the perception that it's somehow manipulative. "The way to get around this idea is to look to help others before helping yourself. Think about the people you're closest to in your network. If those people needed your help, would you be willing to give it? Try to build relationships so they feel that way about you. It's a two-way process."

The reluctant referral
Many accountants aren't comfortable asking clients or others in their network for referrals, but unless you ask, you're unlikely to get them, says Lopata.

"My advice for overcoming this is to try and take the conversation away from the professional relationship. Most accountants only see their clients twice a year to do their books and go through their accounts, and many tack on a request for a referral at the end of this. This isn't the right time because this is when you should be focused on them and their issues, not on you.

"It would be far better to say to a client 'I only see you twice a year and I'd like to get to know you and your business better. Can I take you for a coffee?' If you can create a meeting outside of the norm like this (and it's actually good customer service to do this anyway), it creates a good impression and is a good retention tool. It also creates an opportunity to ask them for a referral."

Reaching out
In the current economic climate, many clients are worrying about whether they can grow their businesses and indeed, whether their business will survive. Those that do survive and thrive will be those that reach out and turn to others for help, whether that's with building their profile, getting support for their ideas and feedback, or getting referrals. "Whatever your aims, you're not going to do it alone. That's an important thing for accountants to remember both for their clients and for themselves."

Businesses that are looking to reach out should ensure they have a strategy in place to make the most of their efforts. "Think about what you want to achieve, what you're investing into it and what a successful return looks like, and make it a serious part of the business approach – don't just think about it as drinks after work.

"For accountants – particularly senior associates and junior partners (i.e. those who are close to becoming a partner but haven't previously had lead generation responsibility) – it's important to understand the role networking can play and how to use their time effectively. Non-billable hours are limited, so they should be looking at how they can be as effective as possible given those considerations."

Andy Loapta is speaking at Sage World 2010, a free event for business owners, directors and entrepreneurs offering practical advice on all aspects of maintaining and growing a business, on 8–9 September at The International Centre in Telford. To find out more about the event and reserve your free ticket, visit

Andy Lopata is a business networking strategist and author of ‘And death came third: The definitive guide to networking and speaking in public’. Read Andy's blog at


About Gina Dyer

About Gina Dyer

I've been a journalist for four years, writing on a wide variety of topics from business and finance to travel, culture and celebrities. I began my career as an editorial assistant for Palladian Publications, a B2B publisher specialising in technical magazines for professionals in primary industries. I later moved into consumer magazines as a staff writer for French Magazine, a monthly travel publication aimed at Francophiles, and was part of the launch team for The Traveller in France, a quarterly magazine produced for the French tourist board. I was also a regular contributor to online travel portal, and later worked with customer publishers Future Plus as a freelance production editor, before joining Sift Media in January 2009. I am currently Deputy Editor of


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03rd Aug 2010 10:19

so true!

I find this so true amongst the members of the accounting community - and this resistance has spread to the social networking concept also.  It is so important not to look at networking as selling, because nobody likes that. We all hate going to a networking event and being sold to.  The other key is that it's about building relationships - which takes time.  We want marketing to produce results immediately.  But that's not how it works!

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04th Aug 2010 00:25

Professional Services Referral Groups

It's clear from this article that Andy is more than a simple expert on what to do and say when you're out networking. No wonder he is described as a networking strategist.

There's loads of useful material on his website. I was especially intrigued by the reference to Professional Services Referral Groups.  What a great concept - bringing together three firms in non-competing but complementary business fields. I assume this could work with a local accountancy practice, a law firm and a financial services or surveying practice.  I've known Andy a while and am very happy to recommend him as a speaker, trainer, facilitator and strategist.

And for the experienced networkers out there - yes I do know that a 'recommendation' is stronger than a mere referral. I have seen Andy in action. I know I can recommend him safe in the knowledge that he won't let me down.


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06th Aug 2010 10:53

Networking: Scarier than death?

This is an interesting book that came out about networking earlier this year. I've met with the author and had coffee to discuss the book and business generally. Very informed and an easy read.

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06th Aug 2010 12:47

Ntworking bloopers!

As an IFA we are long trained in these specific skills. The most basic one (and a particular fault that I observe that accountants in particular are  quilty of) is that you go to events alone, not gang handed and CERTAINLY NOT with chums from your own office.

Another may seem obvious, but take a supply of business cards with you (no seriously, you would not believe it needs saying I know).

Finally, leave the Blackberry in the car. Apart from being antisocial to keep fiddling with it, if one can't leave the office without 'being in touch' at all times, what does that say about you as a businessperson?





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By louiseg
06th Aug 2010 14:06

so so true!

As an accountant who absolutely hated networking I have made some of the errors referred to above.  With much experience behind me I now enjoy certain networking events because it gives me the chance to link up with highly regarded professionals.  I have referred work to many of these people, and they to me - so yes networking does work.

Choosing the right events is always the difficult one, I've been to events where you sit with 9 other people on a round table and 4 of those are other accountants - and guess what, they all say the same things!  Come on guys this is not rocket science - just try and be a little bit original.

I have to admit, even with a reasonable amount of experience I still find some events daunting and do struggle with how to start a conversation - although I got a very good tip from someone a couple of years ago which is very useful when I remember to use it.  (Won't give it out here its too long to explain)

Networking is part of business today, and should be used in the same way as any other business tool - apply it correctly and you will get results!

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06th Aug 2010 16:12



I guess everyone is nervous , but you should really be taking your clients out for coffee on regular basis or a quick email to ask how they are getting along and let them know you are there if they need you. 

I find going into a room very easy, I think that is because I don,t see the room as a place to sell but a place to absorb as much knowledge as I can get.  I love meeting new people and hearing their views or ideas about the future.   

The one thing I do not like about these events, is sometimes you get someone been pompous, or for some reason they think it is funny to try and undermine someone by a smart remark. People freeze and that is life, nobody is perfect . This does not mean that person is not smart or extremely good at their job.  I also think it is manners to try and make the person you are talking to feel at ease.   For anyone who does not like networking , this article confirms you are not the only one. Genuine  Good Manners and smile will always prevail.

-- Kind Regards [email protected] Douglas Accountancy & Bookkeeping Services, Glasgow

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03rd Dec 2010 21:57

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