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ExcelR8 - Neuro energiser drink
ExcelR8_Neuro-energiser

Spreadsheet-themed drink tames Covid hangover

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There’s been a global pandemic and businesses everywhere are struggling with the aftermath. Yet a new drinks brand brings hope to a hard-hit industry sector.

1st Apr 2022
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AccountingWEB has been a long-time fan of spreadsheet-themed beverages, so we were sad to learn recently that the immortal Faceless Spreadsheet Ninja lager had been “retired” by Weird Beard Brew Co. 

The West London-based craft brewery evokes nostalgia for a pre-pandemic era when hipsters would happily pay £3.50 for a half-pint tin of over-strong and wallopingly flavoured ale. Times have been a little bit difficult of late, however. As well as putting its Excel-themed dark lager out to pasture, Weird Beard reports that its “skeleton” staff is now only making up deliveries on Fridays.

But as the sun sets on one legendary brand in this niche, another contender has stepped forward to fill the vacuum: ExcelR8, a “pre-worksheet neuro-energiser” aimed squarely at the accountancy market.

The brand brooks no compromises when it comes to ingredients or recommended daily allowances. For example, one serving contains all the iron you need for nearly two weeks, according to the company behind it. Plus, it is the only business liquid currently on the market containing a trademarked “Acuity Blend”, not to mention powerful essence extracts devised by globally respected neuro numerological scientists.

Incomparable flavours

As for flavours, ExcelR8 offers a choice from Klassik Kouros + Mint Pickl; Golden Nuggets + Lemon Dip Dab Explosion; or Spicy Orange Broccoli Cream Fusion for accountants looking for a more healthy option.

An accompanying video (see below) sketches out the broader claims surrounding ExcelR8: increased concentration, enhanced numerical acuity and optimal worksheet performance.

“We noticed a considerable increase in focus and concentration when it came to numerical work of any kind, but especially spreadsheets,” wrote one independent reviewer. “ExcelR8 has set a bold new standard in the crowded accountancy beverage market. The intense power of this drink has to be tasted to be believed.”

Across the Atlantic, legendary Excel tutor David H Ringstrom was more circumspect: “I type so fast that I need extra protection should my keyboard turn ablaze. Besides that, you seriously want me to convert to ExcelR8? I already went through that already with Lotus 1-2-3. Haven’t I sacrificed enough in this lifetime?” 

Don’t forget Rishi!

If neuro-energetics aren’t your thing and you like your professionally themed drinks a little bit stronger, then don’t forget the famous Rishi Brewnak craft lager from Dhillon Brewery in Coventry, created especially for the 2021 AccountingWEB Live Expo. A light and hoppy brew with 4% ABV, Rishi Brewnak can make you forget the past two years with just a few cans. Apply to AccountingWEB HQ for your 8-tin sampler pack.

Replies (7)

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By paulwakefield1
01st Apr 2022 08:32

Definitely a moment for a lion [chuckle]

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Replying to paulwakefield1:
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By Hugo Fair
01st Apr 2022 19:28

It IS April the 1st isn't it?

Otherwise, "I can't believe it's not balanced" would be my review.

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By ireallyshouldknowthisbut
01st Apr 2022 12:05

I dread to think how much that video cost, but it is absolutely fantastic.

Only 13 views......

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By Crouchy
01st Apr 2022 12:18

Salopian Brewery's 'Looks great on Spreadsheet' is a great golden ale, i sponsored a barrel of this beauty at the local beer festival

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Replying to Crouchy:
John Stokdyk, AccountingWEB head of insight
By John Stokdyk
01st Apr 2022 12:49

Thanks for the tip-off, Crouchy. Now that we appear to have lost Faceless Spreadsheet Ninja, we're on the lookout for replacement liquids.

Perhaps Looks Great... could be a condender for this year's Expo signature beer!

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John Stokdyk, AccountingWEB head of insight
By John Stokdyk
01st Apr 2022 16:41

I definitely think we've tapped into the Zeitgeist here. Kreston Reeves have jumped on the bandwagon too with their Accountancy Juice "100% sustainably sourced" water product:
https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6915609748021129216/

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